Seperation.....

What the hell happened……

This is THE question i have gotten repeatedly over the last 10 months.

When you hide things from people and pretend everything is perfect……. Then announce you're separating followed by your getting divorced… Its a good question. And when you throw in you are still friends and your still interacting with each others families… It does cause a bit of head scratching…. They aren't together anymore………...Yet they are still hanging out together and with with each others kids and families…. ….. Yeah I can see how it can be confusing…

It really is hard to explain. Nothing really happened. No One cheated on the other, pimp smacked, did anything bad. Things just haven't worked in years and we were so busy dealing with the all the other holes in the ship we didn't pay attention to the ones that had to do with us.

We moved waaay too quickly (all you who told us this 6 years ago..SHUUUUUSH. lol). We went from meeting to married less than 9 months. We skipped alot of steps including the ones that would have told us we make better friends than we do a couple. (Once again SHUUUUUUUSH).

Clay and I are different in alot of ways. In some cases this is good. In ours it did not help. We had talks and arguments and all that about what needed to be fixed and what needed to be tweaked and who needed to do what. And sometimes one or both of us would work on things, and in some ways it temporarily fixed things. Or put a band aid on it. But in reality either of us were truly invested enough to do the hard work. And in some ways its because us being married was never a good idea.

We had a lot of fun in our 6 years, and i think that's what really throws people off. We looked happy we were fun to be around. And ya know what we still are and still will be. In the last 10 months we have gotten along better than we have in years. We have had conversations about things we needed to do to make sure our friendship and relationships with each others kids survives this divorce and unlike our marriage we have both put in the effort to keep that going.

I always say I am generally the exception rather than the rule. This is just another example. I have a soon to be ex-husband who is a very close friend, i get to continue to be in his and his kids lives, he will continue to be in my and Joey's life. All we had to do was pull our heads out of our asses and realize we were trying to drive a car with no motor…